{1}{178}25.000 {178}{231}Godfellas {807}{886}[SINGS] {914}{942}[CRASHING] {1078}{1103}[ALARM WAILS] {1205}{1267}-Space pirates!|-Space pirates? {1331}{1388}You know, pirates, but in space. {1447}{1482}Avast, mateys. {1519}{1593}Electronically transfer|your space doubloons... {1615}{1719}...afore I send thee|to Davey Jarg's locker! {1756}{1878}Hey! Keep it down, you kids!|I'm trying to take a nap! {1896}{1973}FRY :|Come on. Come on. {2006}{2071}Make Bender take a nap in a tube. {2071}{2153}Come back when I've had|some sleep, baby. {2257}{2335}Fry to battle stations.|Fire torpedo three. {2389}{2463}Firing torpedo number three. {2522}{2553}What? {2560}{2609}[BENDER SCREAMS] {2668}{2749}That's not torpedo three!|Not at all! {2831}{2909}Damn you, Fry and Lee...la! {2909}{3009}Too late I realize that me children|are me only real treasures. {3119}{3212}Help! Mechanical man overboard! {3232}{3278}Go after him, Leela. {3346}{3412}We were going full speed|when we fired him... {3469}{3517}...so he's going faster than that. {3570}{3670}We can't catch him even if we|rub the engine with cheetah blood? {3954}{4004}I don't know how to say this... {4064}{4142}...but Bender is doomed to drift|through space. Forever. {4142}{4199}He always wanted to drift forever... {4264}{4334}...but through the American Southwest. {4351}{4416}I'm going too fast.|I've gotta lose momentum. {4416}{4530}I'm gonna spend eternity alone|with barely any swag. Ooh! {4622}{4737}Hey universe, check out the dude|with the Rolex. {4743}{4849}Wow, ostentatious. Except what good|is a candelabra without--? {4849}{4919}Wait, I know. {4976}{5014}Ah, the pity. {5228}{5262}Fated to drift forever through|the void as gravity's plaything. {5262}{5333}Oh, cruel fate, to be thusly boned. {5427}{5551}Ask not for whom the bone bones.|It bones for thee. {5564}{5624}The only thing that keeps me sane... {5674}{5760}...is the thought that I have all|eternity in which to perfect my art. {5760}{5785}[PLA YS DISCORDANT NOTES] {5878}{5926}Ah! Damn you! {5935}{5980}Now, when I'm found in a million years,|people will know what the score was. {5980}{6049}Hey, what's bombarding me? {6113}{6161}Oh, no, an asteroid field. {6223}{6309}If even a pea-sized asteroid goes|through my skull... {6309}{6366}...it could hurt slightly. {6452}{6523}Well, that was fun.|Now for eons of loneliness. {6523}{6552}[QUIET MUMBLING] {6558}{6584}Eh? {6702}{6794}Fellow Shrimpkins, behold him|that hath taken us onto his breast. {6794}{6835}Holy frijoles. {6996}{7122}All bow before the great Metal Lord. {7152}{7288}Worshipers? This ought to liven up|my endless tragic voyage. {7454}{7496}[LAUGHS MANIACALL Y] {7684}{7787}-All hail the Metal Lord.|-So hailed. {7838}{7900}Those peewees think I'm God, huh?|Hard to blame them. {7900}{7996}-I am the Metal Lord. Who are you?|-I am called Malachi. {8020}{8051}It means|"He who really loves the Metal Lord." {8051}{8148}Listen here, time for a religious|donation. Hand over your wallet! {8148}{8213}But we are a poor and simple folk. {8215}{8286}Poor? Oh, crap! {8426}{8465}MALACHl: Pity me not, for I am richened|by the love of my family. {8465}{8494}-What art thou doing, Malachi Jr.?|-I'm practicing to hug Daddy. {8494}{8558}Gag unto me with a spoon. {8572}{8615}It's time I laid down|a few commandments. {8615}{8686}You got a chisel?|Take this down. Number one.... {8686}{8730}Behold, the one commandment: {8820}{8860}BENDER:|Make it a double! {8938}{8975}[SNIFFING] {9028}{9117}-Can you find him, professor?|-The Smell-a-Scope isn't strong enough. {9117}{9170}Bender's odor is so mild, it's|being overpowered by local sources. {9170}{9206}Hooray!|People are paying attention to me. {9206}{9263}Fry, we brought someone to|cheer you up. {9302}{9382}His name is Helper. He is eager|to be your new best friend. {9382}{9434}Hello, chum. Miss your buddy? {9518}{9564}-Have a pudding pop.|-No, l-- {9621}{9696}-Want to go to an amusement park?|-Well, okay. {9696}{9793}-Have fun. Hey, I heard Bender's back.|-What? Really? {9842}{9936}No. I just thought you would|enjoy that for a moment. {9977}{10113}[THEME FROM|2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY PLA YS] {10159}{10234}Microbrewed. My guys did all right. {10372}{10480}I think I'll make my countenance|to shine down upon them. {10556}{10600}Good work. There's no slowing down|with the Metal Lord tonight. {10600}{10728}-Yes, tonight is kind of special.|-Did you rip off your arm as a joke? {11101}{11174}Nay. Like most of your followers, I|was maimed building the great brewery. {11174}{11243}Others died from the fumes|it spewed forth. {11243}{11375}And, of course, the liquor industry|attracted organized crime. {11400}{11442}It's all my fault. {11585}{11688}Malachi, tell thy people that|the Lord is moved by their plight. {11688}{11789}-Malachi Jr.! No!|-Daddy, I can't hold much longer. {11789}{11908}-My arms are tired from hugging.|-Save him. Save my son, Metal Lord. {11908}{11976}This looks like a job for God. {11999}{12098}What the--? Malachi, what manner|of deal is this with the chanting? {12098}{12146}They saw you save my son. Now|everyone prays for their own miracles. {12146}{12197}Very well. What do they want? {12249}{12346}The people of that village|pray for wealth. {12353}{12390}That was a practice miracle.|Who's next? {12390}{12432}MALACHl:|They pray for sunlight... {12434}{12532}...so their barley might make|a more refreshing beer. {12592}{12684}Very well. Let there be light. {12720}{12797}-Yippee!|-Hooray! {12840}{12886}[SCREAMING] {12926}{12982}I got it. I got it. {12982}{13086}When you're writing the Bible, you|might want to omit that last miracle. {13086}{13139}FRY :|He decided not to let go. {13192}{13241}I can't believe you're gone.|I won't! {13241}{13335}If I can't reach you physically,|I'll try something crazy. {13364}{13430}That's my story,|Father Changstein el Gamahl. {13497}{13600}-Can religion help me find my friend?|-We could join together in prayer. {13600}{13691}-But is there anything useful we can do?|-No. {13707}{13846}Sure, I hold śance, channel|your friend. No problem. Insert coin. {13862}{13902}[MOANS] {13955}{14026}I am your friend, Bonder. {14116}{14251}-Bonder? Is it really you?|-Yes. I am fine. Give the gypsy $10. {14280}{14376}Wait, Bender's name isn't Bonder,|it's Bender. You're a fraud. {14376}{14417}-You want false hope or not?|-Only if there's no real hope. {14417}{14547}There is perhaps one way. Have you|heard of the Monks of the Shubah? {14591}{14679}-I've not heard of them.|-They are an ancient order... {14693}{14780}...that believes God exists|in the depths of space. {14790}{14866}They have built|a powerful radio telescope... {14868}{14938}...high in the Himalayas|to search for him. {14955}{15035}-They'd let me use it to find Bender?|-What am l, psychic? {15035}{15105}I mean, yes.|I'm sure they will. Yes. {15125}{15223}[STRAUSS' "THE BLUE DANUBE" PLA YS] {15223}{15261}MALACHl:|Oh, Metal Lord, hear my prayer! {15261}{15320}Yes, Malachi. What is it this time? {15750}{15828}The infidels on your back|no longer believe in you. {15828}{15886}They say their prayers go unheeded. {15898}{15976}How am I supposed to hear prayers|coming out of my ass? {15976}{16044}They talk of war against the faithful.|I beseech thee, rise up against them. {16044}{16118}Smite someone|who deserves it for once. {16131}{16216}Every time I interfere,|I only make things worse. {16261}{16353}-lt's best to solve your own problems.|-But Metal Lord-- {16353}{16444}What part of nay|doesn't thou understand? {16467}{16586}I'm outfitting an expedition|to the Himalayas. I'll need a coat. {16590}{16632}I miss Bender almost half as much|as you do, but it's hopeless. {16632}{16705}You can't give up hope just|because it's hopeless. {16823}{16917}You gotta hope even more and cover|your ears and go, "Blah, blah!" {16965}{17031}FRY YELLS: I'd also like a pack mule!|-At once, sir! {17031}{17075}Well, you won't listen to reason... {17075}{17146}...so I'll listen to idiotic-ness|and come too. {17151}{17204}But we'll need a Sherpa to guide us. {17238}{17263}[MAN SCREAMS] {17344}{17429}Now that's one Bible|that doesn't disappoint. {17475}{17546}Looks like society's running pretty|well without my meddling in-- {17546}{17635}Atomic bombs? Those unbelievers from|my backside found my nuclear pile. {17635}{17710}Fear not, Lord.|We shall be with you soon. {17746}{17824}This is the maximum level|of being with me! {17855}{17982}We will solve our own problems.|It is time to convert the unbelievers. {17982}{18045}-Convert them?|-To radioactive vapor! {18302}{18398}Look, Daddy, I'm hugging God. {18427}{18544}Maybe if I hug him real hard,|he'll save us from-- {18561}{18605}No! {18684}{18747}Oh, it tickles. {18788}{18827}[GIGGLES] {18844}{18869}[GROANS] {18925}{19063}BENDER: Hello? Is anyone still alive?|How about in the porno theater? {19095}{19131}Don't be embarrassed. {19263}{19336}They're dead. All dead. {19361}{19460}Who would have known playing God|could have such terrible consequences? {19460}{19594}If I die of exhaustion, make sure my|body freezes in a dignified position. {19621}{19681}None of that|"huddled for warmth" crap. {19681}{19788}Behold! The monastery of the Shubah. {19829}{19901}I must leave.|I am not holy enough to enter. {20013}{20049}Okay. {20100}{20169}Looks rickety. We'd better test it. {20188}{20233}FEMALE VOICE:|Welcome to our monastery. {20326}{20431}Please stand to one side|to let faster pilgrims by. {20431}{20482}[WEEPS] {20562}{20619}[BEEPING] {20619}{20658}Hey! That galaxy's signaling in binary.|I've gotta signal back! {20658}{20731}But I only know enough binary to ask|for the bathroom. Speak English? {20731}{20797}GALAXY VOICE:|I do now. {20843}{20890}What are you, a galactic computer? {20890}{20987}Possible. I am user-friendly,|my good chum. {20997}{21032}-Who built you?|-I have always been. {21032}{21075}Oh, my God! Are you God? {21075}{21191}Possible. I do feel compassion|for all living things, my good chum. {21241}{21366}But why would God think in binary?|Unless you're not God... {21406}{21482}...but the remains of a computerized|space probe that collided with God! {21482}{21523}That seems probable. {21551}{21654}A member of our brotherhood sits|at the controls constantly... {21680}{21725}...scanning the heavens for God. {21725}{21754}There he is! No. No, wait. No. {21754}{21832}-How long have you been at it?|-700 years. {21898}{21927}We've not yet examined|one ten-millionth of the sky. {21927}{22033}We will find the Almighty,|even if it takes to the end of time. {22037}{22117}-And then what?|-Then we utter unto him a short prayer. {22254}{22342}See, the telescope is also|an amplifying transmitter. {22444}{22515}-Like a giant karaoke machine?|-Not really. {22580}{22690}-Want to see our giant karaoke machine?|-Not really. {22895}{22948}Finding God, that's important... {22999}{23120}...but it might be a treat if you let|me use the telescope to find my friend. {23208}{23293}I don't know what to say,|other than absolutely not! {23311}{23390}-Your loss is tragic, but our work--|-You can look for God forever. {23390}{23453}I'm just asking for one lifetime|to find my friend! {23453}{23538}He speaks out of love for his friend.|Perhaps that love is God. {23538}{23614}How convenient. A theory about God|that doesn't require a telescope. {23614}{23653}Get back to work! {24336}{24393}That telescope is as much mine|as anybody's! {24503}{24588}I'll use it with or without|permission! {24611}{24735}Your order may be famous for martial|arts, but I can clobber any holy man. {24740}{24821}Actually, we only practice|martial arts as meditation. {24885}{24933}We are strictly nonviolent. {25094}{25181}Then get in the laundry room,|or I'll kick your butts! {25181}{25271}Oh, this is the worst crazy sect|I've ever been in. {25289}{25356}BENDER: Do you know what I'll do|before I do it? {25412}{25474}-Yes.|-What if I do something different? {25582}{25651}-Then I don't know that.|-Cool, cool. {25693}{25750}-A lot of people pray to you, huh?|-Yes, but so many ask so much... {25750}{25812}...after a while, you just|tune it out. {25884}{25934}You know, I was God once. {25935}{25979}Yes, I saw. You were doing well|until everyone died. {25979}{26080}It was awful. I tried helping them.|I tried not helping them. {26080}{26110}In the end, I couldn't do any good.|Do you think what I did was wrong? {26110}{26197}Right and wrong are words.|What matters is what you do. {26197}{26269}Yeah, I know. That's why I asked|if what I did-- Oh, forget it. {26269}{26321}Bender, being God isn't easy. {26321}{26420}Do too much, people get dependent.|If you do nothing, they lose hope. {26420}{26521}You must use a light touch,|like a safecracker or a pickpocket. {26521}{26582}Or a guy who burns a bar for|insurance money! {26696}{26752}Yes, if you make it look like|an electrical thing. {26752}{26875}When you do things right, people won't|be sure you've done anything at all. {26875}{26967}Does that mean you wouldn't send me to|Earth, even if I prayed? {26967}{26998}Earth? Which way is that? {26998}{27033}I don't know. {27108}{27148}FRY :|Bender? Bender? {27301}{27371}MONK: Let us out! We cooked our shoes|in the dryer and ate them. {27371}{27414}Now we're bored! {27476}{27569}-Has anyone out there seen Bender?|MALE VOICE: No! Quit asking! {27604}{27707}It's been three days. Even if|you stay the rest of your life... {27777}{27888}...there is virtually no chance|of finding him. It's time to give up. {27888}{27986}You're right.|I'm never gonna see him again. {27992}{28080}I know he was evil,|and on more than one occasion... {28156}{28205}...he actually stole my blood. {28205}{28305}But still, I wish I had Bender back. {28307}{28362}FRY :|I Wish I had Bender back! {28831}{28856}GALAXY VOICE:|Huh? {28909}{28985}-What? You say something?|-No. No. {28997}{29095}Well, so long.|Remember what we talked about. {29095}{29136}Hot! Hot! Hot! {29252}{29306}Bender! It's a miracle! {29413}{29441}[FRY SCREAMS] {29456}{29552}This is, by a wide margin,|the least likely thing ever to happen. {29552}{29590}You'll never believe what happened!|First, I was God. Then I met God! {29590}{29650}-We locked up some monks!|-Oh, no! {29688}{29763}We forgot to let them|out of the laundry room! {29782}{29866}Do we have to? They're monks.|Their God will let them out... {29866}{29934}-...or give them more shoes to eat.|BENDER: Fat chance! {29961}{30058}You can't count on God for jack!|He pretty much told me so! {30080}{30114}Now come on! If we don't|save those monks, no one will! {30114}{30150}[CHUCKLES] {30150}{30273}When you do things right, people won't|be sure you've done anything at all. {30368}{30393}Subtitles by|SDI Media Group {30450}{30475}[ENGLISH SDH]