{192}{241}Hell is Other Robots
{843}{873}This is awesome!
{878}{943}I've waited 1 000 years|for this show.
{948}{1023}-Can I get anybody a beer?|-Sure!
{1152}{1246}EMCEE: Ladies and gentlemen,|here to lay down some old, old...
{1252}{1304}...incredibly old-school beats...
{1310}{1403}... the Beastie Boys!
{1408}{1444}[SQUEAKY CART]
{1523}{1598}Well, now, don 't you tell me to smile
{1604}{1654}You stick around|I'll make it worth your while
{1659}{1708}I've got numbers beyond|What you can dial
{1714}{1763}Maybe it's because I'm so versatile
{1768}{1814}Style, profile, I said
{1820}{1875}It always brings me back|When I hear "Ooh Child"
{1896}{2003}Impressive. They're busting|mad rhymes with an 80o/o success rate.
{2008}{2106}That qualifies as ill,|from a technical standpoint.
{2112}{2193}Will you guys shut up?|I'm trying to look cool.
{2202}{2253}Tammy D. getting biz on the crop
{2258}{2302}Beastie Boys know to let the beat
{2329}{2370}Drop
{2375}{2414}Ow! How's it going?
{2420}{2463}Enjoying the show? Ow!
{2471}{2533}Don't forget to pick up a T-shirt!
{2539}{2599}Wow! An old-fashioned mosh pit!
{2605}{2685}Tonight we're gonna|party like it's 1 999.
{2690}{2720}Again.
{2729}{2805}["SUPER DISCO BREAKIN' " PLAYS]
{2891}{2934}Ow! Hey, watch it!
{3075}{3137}These guys rock harder than ever!
{3143}{3189}Oh, my
{3195}{3228}It's a mirage
{3233}{3284}Telling you all it's a...
{3290}{3378}...sabotage
{3383}{3443}Sabotage, yeah
{3448}{3482}Peace! We out!
{3487}{3522}[CROWD CHEERS]
{3677}{3728}-Hey, Bender!|-Hey, Fender!
{3733}{3793}I haven't seen you|since high school!
{3799}{3863}-Still work at Jack in the Box?|-No. . .
{3869}{3904}. . .I'm with the band.
{3963}{4009}Oh, oh yeah.
{4014}{4108}Fellas, meet my friends,|Bender, Fry and Leela.
{4114}{4182}We're not that interested|in meeting them.
{4188}{4238}Wow! I love you guys!
{4243}{4308}In my century,|I had all five albums.
{4313}{4376}That was 1 000 years ago.|Now we got seven.
{4381}{4462}Can I borrow the new ones|and some blank tapes?
{4499}{4583}Let's ditch these organ sacks|and hit the real party.
{4588}{4659}Count me in.|I'm gonna drink until I reboot!
{4736}{4779}[ROBOTS MOAN]
{4831}{4878}What kind of party is this?
{4884}{4934}No booze and only one hooker.
{4940}{5003}Don't be a drag, man.|We're jacking-on.
{5082}{5155}Oh. . .yeah!
{5165}{5228}-Want a jolt?|-I'm no square. . .
{5233}{5301}. . .but it's counter-indicated|by my manual.
{5306}{5333}[ROBOTS LAUGH]
{5338}{5381}"Counter-indicated. "
{5386}{5464}Come on, grab a jack.|I told them you were cool.
{5474}{5557}If jacking-on makes strangers|think I'm cool. . .
{5562}{5592}. . .I'll do it!
{5649}{5687}[MUMBLES]
{5745}{5817}[SITAR MUSIC PLAYS]
{5923}{5960}[GULPS]
{6099}{6140}[GIGGLES]
{6277}{6314}[MUMBLES]
{6384}{6446}Easy, baby.|Don't want to get hooked.
{6451}{6548}Don't worry. I don't have|an addictive personality.
{6724}{6796}What are we doing|in this bad neighborhood?
{6802}{6842}Shut up, square!
{6913}{6957}I'll just be a minute.
{7285}{7381}Wretched sinner unit,|the path to robot heaven lies here. . .
{7387}{7435}. . .in the Good Book, 3.0.
{7440}{7540}Do I preach to you when you're|lying stoned in the gutter?
{7546}{7610}No! So beat it!
{7635}{7666}Tsk, tsk, tsk.
{7700}{7725}Who was that?
{7731}{7804}Your mama. Now shut up|and drag me to work!
{7860}{7904}[BENDER MOANS]
{7957}{8035}Our electric bill's up|like a snake up sugarcane.
{8040}{8126}Someone here's been wasting|a whole heap of juice.
{8132}{8184}-Probably you!|-Me?
{8230}{8328}-Good morning, Bender.|-None of your business! Lay off!
{8363}{8471}-What's his problem?|-Looks like he's abusing electricity.
{8476}{8506}Bender? No way.
{8511}{8543}[ELECTRIC SURGE]
{8548}{8592}I would've noticed.
{8637}{8718}Why are you spending so much|time in the bathroom?
{8724}{8802}-Are you jacking-on?|BENDER: No! Don't come in!
{8809}{8913}Good news, everyone!|Today you'll deliver subpoenas. . .
{8918}{8982}. . .to Sicily 8, the Mob Planet.
{9007}{9059}All right! Let's get to work!
{9066}{9118}I'll be out in a second!
{9289}{9367}Vinny said he was giving me|the kiss of death. . .
{9372}{9455}-. . .but I think he was gay.|-Did he use his tongue?
{9461}{9494}A little.
{9515}{9547}[MUMBLES]
{9552}{9632}-You okay?|-None of your business! Lay off me!
{9638}{9720}Uh-oh. There's an electrical|disturbance ahead.
{9726}{9793}-What kind of disturbance?|-Electrical.
{9798}{9878}It will take some|careful piloting to avoid it.
{10228}{10277}[LAUGHS]
{10287}{10351}We're heading into|the electric field!
{10357}{10423}FRY:|What's happening? I feel weird!
{10488}{10583}Come on, universe!|You big, mostly empty wuss!
{10588}{10648}Give me all the juice you got!
{10681}{10752}[STAMMERS]
{10829}{10870}Oh, mama.
{11122}{11152}[CRASHES]
{11260}{11290}What?
{11303}{11384}We didn't mind your drinking,|your kleptomania. . .
{11390}{11475}-. . .or the pornography.|-That's why we loved you.
{11481}{11573}But this abuse crossed the line.|You almost killed us.
{11579}{11628}FRY:|You betrayed my trust.
{11635}{11708}Like when my friend|swore he wasn't on drugs. . .
{11713}{11760}. . .then sold me my mom's VCR.
{11766}{11885}Later I found out he was taking drugs.|I'm ashamed to be your friend.
{11914}{12009}You're right. I'm a lost cause.
{12190}{12231}[ELECTRIC BUZZING]
{12236}{12276}[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYS]
{12356}{12428}Maybe there's another way.
{12489}{12578}BENDER:|Oh, yeah! That's the good stuff.
{12622}{12738}What am I doing?|What have I become?
{12804}{12876}I see a lot of fancy robots|here today. . .
{12881}{12994}. . .made of real shiny metal. But|that don't impress the Robot Devil!
{13000}{13048}-No, sir!|-If you're a sinner. . .
{13054}{13129}. . .he'll plug his infernal modem|in the wall. . .
{13134}{13189}. . .belching smoke and flame!
{13195}{13264}He'll download you|straight to Robot Hell!
{13270}{13400}-Straight to hell!|-Who will stand up and be saved?
{13408}{13448}Who? Who?
{13549}{13593}Me.
{13723}{13819}As another cost-cutting measure,|no more salt-water cooler.
{13825}{13866}This is a witch hunt!
{13871}{13939}BENDER:|Oh, what a beautiful morning
{13945}{14013}Oh, what a beautiful day
{14018}{14095}Greetings, friends!|Don't we look nice today?
{14100}{14162}He's whacked out on electricity again.
{14167}{14217}I'm whacked out on life!
{14222}{14310}My friends, I found religion.
{14356}{14449}Religion? ls this another scam|to get free yarmulkes?
{14454}{14488}Give him a break.
{14493}{14574}If this helps Bender,|then we should be supportive.
{14582}{14624}-Yeah.|-Oh, yes.
{14629}{14710}Wonderful!|Then you'll all come to my long. . .
{14716}{14778}. . .un-air-conditioned baptism!
{14796}{14857}-Uh. . . .|-Oh, l, um. . . . .
{14894}{14968}We are gathered|to deliver Brother Bender. . .
{14973}{15042}. . .from the cold steel grip|of the Devil. . .
{15047}{15138}. . .unto the cold steel bosom|of our congregation.
{15143}{15206}-Tell it, preacher!|-That equals true.
{15211}{15315}Brother Bender, do you accept|the principles of Robotology. . .
{15321}{15384}. . .on pain of damnation|in Robot Hell?
{15390}{15484}-Yes, I do!|-Then I will now baptize you.
{15490}{15533}Press any key to continue.
{15732}{15799}[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYS]
{15918}{15999}While you're at it,|could you touch up this seam?
{16121}{16214}Unbelievable. The old Bender|would never buy us dinner.
{16220}{16304}Old Bender's gone.|He won't trouble you anymore.
{16312}{16393}Would monsieur|care to see the wine list?
{16457}{16578}No poison for us, thanks.|I'll stick with good old mineral oil.
{16635}{16665}Functional.
{16717}{16785}I'm hungrier than a snake|in a cane field.
{16802}{16843}Friends! Friends!
{16849}{16953}Surely you're not going to eat|before we say Robot Grace?
{17006}{17089}In the name of all|that is logical, we give thanks. . .
{17095}{17158}. . .for the energy|we are about to absorb.
{17163}{17209}Quoting Prophet Jerimatic:
{17215}{17345}"One-zero-zero-zero-one-zero-one-|zero-one-zero-one-zero-one.
{17358}{17401}Zero-zero-one.
{17407}{17461}Zero-one-one-zero-zero-one.
{17468}{17498}Two. "
{17504}{17538}Amen.
{17543}{17608}-Does that mean we can eat now?|-Yes.
{17614}{17718}But first, since I love you all|so much. . .
{17726}{17784}. . .I'd like to give everyone hugs.
{17790}{17893}-Come here, Fry!|-I don't want to.
{17990}{18080}Fry, you're my friend.
{18138}{18197}Everyone line up for a hug!
{18202}{18277}Let's tear down some emotional walls.
{18462}{18537}-What are you doing to my ship?|-Sanctifying it.
{18575}{18660}There. That ought to convert|a few tailgaters.
{18666}{18748}-His dumb religion's driving me nuts.|-Amen.
{18754}{18864}He should've joined a mainstream|religion, like Oprah-ism or voodoo.
{18870}{18949}-We've got to get old Bender back.|-I know how.
{18955}{19055}We have to reacquaint him|with a little thing called "sleaze. "
{19138}{19248}Somebody hired an interstellar|spaceship to deliver a package. . .
{19253}{19330}. . .to Atlantic City?|What are we delivering?
{19351}{19381}This.
{19386}{19426}Where to?
{19453}{19492}Here.
{19499}{19550}Another job well done.
{19555}{19658}Back to the office for an evening|of fasting and repentance.
{19672}{19778}Wait! As long as we're here,|why not see some exotic dancing?
{19784}{19832}Hey, great idea!
{19898}{19964}But those girls don't wear cases!
{19970}{20064}-You can see their bare circuits!|-Come on, it'll be fun.
{20069}{20135}We could even drink|some fortified wine.
{20141}{20196}What? Drinking wine is a sin.
{20202}{20255}Even if it is delicious.
{20261}{20370}Look at that woman's purse.|It's hanging by a spaghetti strand.
{20408}{20505}-Thou shalt not snatch!|-There's Hooker-Bot 5000.
{20510}{20555}She's got a heart of gold.
{20560}{20659}-Hey, sailing unit.|-Stop tempting me!
{20665}{20738}For once in my life,|I have inner peace!
{20746}{20823}That's for losers!|Come on, sin your heart out!
{20828}{20866}-Go nuts!|-Live a little.
{20871}{20911}Could you hold my purse?
{20916}{20993}Go for it, Bender.|You know you want to.
{20998}{21034}Well. . . .
{21047}{21087}[BENDER LAUGHS]
{21144}{21205}I'm the greatest!
{21243}{21338}-We got the old Bender back.|-You know it, pork pie!
{21344}{21390}Except for one thing.
{21484}{21517}[BEEPING]
{21633}{21693}As a major Hollywood director. . .
{21698}{21758}. . .I'll be holding auditions|tonight.
{21763}{21836}Even though you're all young|and naive. . .
{21842}{21918}. . .I think you might have|what it takes.
{21923}{21955}[GIRL ROBOTS LAUGH]
{21960}{21985}[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
{21990}{22110}I'm trying to score here! Can't you|read the "Do Not Disturb" sign?
{22128}{22158}[MUMBLES]
{22225}{22303}No! No!
{22426}{22477}DEVIL:|Greetings, Bender!
{22482}{22563}Welcome to Robot Hell!
{22594}{22648}[SCREAMS]
{22716}{22790}-What happened to Bender?|-He didn't check out.
{22795}{22826}The ashtray's here.
{22831}{22874}[YELPS]
{22880}{22950}Nibbler's caught the scent|of vodka and oil!
{22958}{23012}Go, boy! Follow that stench!
{23130}{23181}I'm hallucinating, right?
{23187}{23271}No, Bender! Robot Hell is quite real.
{23277}{23320}Here's our brochure.
{23352}{23458}I don't belong here.|I don't like scary and painful things.
{23463}{23566}Sorry. You agreed to this|when you joined our religion.
{23572}{23634}If you sin, you go to Robot Hell. . .
{23640}{23698}. . .for all eternity!
{23703}{23743}Aw, hell--|I mean, heck.
{23748}{23794}You can say that here.
{23900}{23942}I remember this place.
{23947}{24034}They closed it after people|caught salmonella.
{24254}{24340}Look! It's the symbol|of Bender's old religion.
{24415}{24455}Unbelievable!
{24460}{24529}It's an actual, factual|Robot Hell!
{24535}{24631}Who would've thought Hell would|exist and be in New Jersey?
{24637}{24664}Actually--
{24669}{24714}Whoa!
{24769}{24810}We know all your sins. . .
{24815}{24935}. . .and prepared an agonizing|and ironic punishment for each one.
{24941}{24978}Gentlemen?
{25027}{25118}Oh, crap. Singing.|Mind if I smoke?
{25195}{25251}Cigars are evil|You won 't miss them
{25257}{25315}We'll find ways to simulate|That smell
{25321}{25408}What a sorry fella|Rolled up in smoke like a panatela
{25413}{25488}Here on Level 1 of Robot Hell
{25568}{25676}Gambling's wrong, so is cheating|So is forging phony IOUs
{25692}{25781}Let's let Lady Luck decide|What type of torture's justified
{25787}{25841}I'm pit boss here on Level 2.
{25873}{25907}Deep-fried robot!
{25912}{25988}-Just tell me why|-Read this 55-page warrant
{25993}{26087}-There must be robots worse than I|-There really aren 't
{26092}{26187}Please let me explain|My crimes were merely boyish pranks
{26193}{26288}-You stole from nuns and banks|-Blame my upbringing
{26294}{26355}Please stop sinning while I'm singing
{26402}{26516}Selling bootleg tapes is wrong|Musicians need that income to survive
{26521}{26554}Bender gonna make noise
{26559}{26634}With your hard drive scratched|By the Beastie Boys
{26655}{26741}That's what you what you|What you get on Level 5
{26746}{26823}-I don 't feel well|-It's up to us to rescue him
{26828}{26928}-Maybe he likes it here in Hell|-It's us who tempted him to sin
{26933}{27020}-Maybe he's back at the motel|-Fry, don 't be scared
{27026}{27073}I'm sure we'll be spared
{27078}{27186}-Just sit back, enjoy the ride|-My ass has blisters from the slide
{27235}{27286}Fencing diamonds, cockfights
{27292}{27346}Publishing indecent magazines
{27351}{27441}You'll pay for every crime|Knee-deep in electric slime
{27446}{27496}Suffering to the end of time
{27501}{27555}Enduring tortures which rhyme
{27560}{27658}Trapped forever here in Robot Hell
{27722}{27793}Of course, that's just for starters.
{27885}{27951}-Bender, are you all right?|-No.
{27956}{28048}They're tormenting me with|up-tempo singing and dancing.
{28054}{28140}All right, Beelzebot.|How can we get our friend back?
{28145}{28234}Sorry, I hold the cards.|There's nothing you can do.
{28239}{28316}Now, if you'll sign this|fiddle contest waiver.
{28334}{28388}Wait. What fiddle contest?
{28405}{28500}The Fairness in Hell Act of 2275. . .
{28506}{28613}. . .requires me to inform you that|if you win a fiddle contest. . .
{28619}{28668}. . .you win back Bender's soul.
{28674}{28781}-As well as a solid gold fiddle.|-Wouldn't it weigh 1 000 pounds. . .
{28787}{28860}-. . .and sound crummy?|-It's mostly for show.
{28876}{28939}-Do you know how to play?|-No. Do you?
{28945}{29019}No. But I played drums.|They're similar.
{29025}{29125}-What happens if we lose?|-You'll win a small, silver fiddle.
{29131}{29214}Also, I guess I'll kill one of you.|Him.
{29220}{29294}-We'll do it.|-Very well, then.
{29300}{29353}Beat this!
{29358}{29402}[PLAYS FIDDLE]
{29542}{29577}Well, we're boned.
{29625}{29678}Your turn.
{29690}{29720}[CLEARS THROAT]
{29755}{29795}[BAD FIDDLE PLAYING]
{29803}{29823}Ha!
{29828}{29883}Time for the drum solo.
{29906}{29944}[DEVIL SCREAMS]
{29959}{29998}Run!
{30227}{30297}Stop them! They cheated!
{30386}{30450}[HALLELUJAH CHORUS PLAYS]
{30611}{30654}-Hurry, Bender!|-I could. . .
{30660}{30724}. . .if you'd drop|the stupid gold violin.
{30730}{30770}Oh. Sorry.
{30879}{30932}-Yeah!|-All right!
{30937}{31043}Don't worry. I'll never be|too good or too evil again.
{31049}{31119}From now on, I'll just be me.
{31125}{31218}Do you think you could be|a little less evil than that?
{31223}{31328}I don't know. You think you|could survive a 700-foot fall?
{31340}{31393}Good old Bender.
{31464}{31543}Yeah, yeah, this one goes out|To my man Bender
{31548}{31678}Sending this out, special dedication|To all my people in robot homeworld
{31704}{31824}We got the professor|My man Dr. Zoidberg
{31830}{31900}I'd like to shout out|A personal shout-out to Leela
{31908}{31978}Right|My man Bender
{31998}{32048}Nibbler, Nibbler in the house
{32055}{32133}Big shout out to all the Futurama
{32275}{32300}Subtitles by|SDI Media Group
{32304}{32329}[ENGLISH SDH]